Have you ever found yourself chasing someone else’s definition of success? Perhaps you’re measuring your achievements against arbitrary financial milestones, or feeling like you’re constantly running on a treadmill of “what’s next?” without ever feeling satisfied?
You’re not alone.
Recently, I shared a LinkedIn post about my dream life costing less than £10K per month after tax. The response was overwhelming – it seems many of us are questioning traditional definitions of success and wondering if there’s a better way to define what truly matters.
The Problem with Traditional Success Metrics
We’ve all heard them:
“You need to hit 10K months”
“Aim for six-figure years”
“Your first million by 40”
But what do these numbers actually mean? Are we talking profit before tax? After tax? Revenue? Cash in the bank?
More importantly, what do we actually achieve when we reach these dizzy heights of success? Does hitting an arbitrary number suddenly transform our lives into exactly what we want them to be?
The truth is, we’ve become caught up in measuring success by wealth, status, and possessions. But what if success isn’t about the numbers at all? What if it’s about something far more meaningful?
What Does Success Mean to You?
Take a moment to pause and reflect. What does success actually mean to you?
Is it:
- Financial stability?
- Personal growth?
- Strong relationships?
- Freedom to choose how you spend your time?
- Making a positive impact?
For me, success is about having the freedom to choose how I spend my time. It’s about pursuing my passions, picking my son up from school, giving him opportunities to try clubs and learn what he enjoys, being able to say yes to attending the school play, and going on adventures to explore the world together.
It’s about living in alignment with my values – like sustainability. My son knows I don’t like plastic, and that’s my value shining through to the next generation. That feels like success to me.
Values: The Foundation of Authentic Success
Our values play a crucial role in defining what success looks like. Without understanding your core values, you risk chasing a version of success that will never truly satisfy you.
What are your core values? Here are some to consider:
- Fairness
- Leisure
- Responsibility
- Respect
- Fun
- Joy
- Trust
- Vulnerability
- Family
Use your own words to identify what matters most to you. Then ask yourself:
- Do I currently live in line with these values?
- When was I fully living these values, and how did it feel?
- What did I see, hear, and experience during those moments?
These reflections help reveal what you truly want your life to be.
Creating Your Dream Life Plan
Once you have clarity on your values, you can create a meaningful dream life plan. This isn’t about setting arbitrary financial goals but designing a life that brings you genuine fulfilment.
Your dream life plan might include:
- Holidays that allow true relaxation
- Owning your own home
- Having more time and choice
- Not stressing about business finances
- Supporting charities you care about
- Accessing private healthcare
- Having time or money to support your family
The specifics are deeply personal, which is why it’s so important for you to explore what you genuinely want. I encourage doing this exercise with your partner and children – it often leads to fascinating conversations and shared visions.
I did this with my family at the beginning of the year. This weekend, we’re attending a concert my partner mentioned back then as something he’d love to do. Because we wrote it down, we made it happen.
Real-Life Examples of Living Your Values
Finding True Relaxation
For years, I’ve taken school half-terms off, but I never truly relaxed. This summer was different because I started working with a VA last year. It took time to work out what to delegate and how to collaborate effectively, but this summer, it all came together.
I had an important all-day speaking engagement and simply didn’t have time to get everything prepared. My wonderful VA Gemma produced a professional brochure that was better than anything I could have created myself, and she did it while I was on holiday. When I returned, everything was ready for my event.
Having that support is now my reality, and perhaps it could be part of your dream life vision too.
Patience in Property Dreams
One of my clients wanted to purchase a property, which we started discussing in 2020 when I asked about his big life goals. At that point, he had the desire but no plan, no numbers, and no idea how his business would help achieve this goal.
Now, he’s had an offer accepted and is just waiting for the keys. We’ve transformed a concept from early 2020 into reality – his dream life playing out in real time.
I share this story because redefining success doesn’t mean everything happens overnight. It took four and a half years for this particular dream to materialise, but he consistently took steps toward it. The journey matters as much as the destination.
Taking Steps Toward Your Definition of Success
Redefining success is a process that begins with questioning societal norms and understanding what truly matters to you. It continues with aligning your actions with your values and creating a vision for your life that excites and fulfils you.
Remember:
- Identify your core values
- Create a dream life vision based on those values
- Break down that vision into actionable steps
- Track your progress not just in numbers but in alignment and fulfilment
- Celebrate the journey, not just the destination
Ready to Redefine Success on Your Terms?
If you’re tired of chasing someone else’s definition of success and want to create a vision that truly aligns with your values, I invite you to take my free “Get Financially Fit” quiz. This will help you identify your relationship with money and success, and provide personalised recommendations for creating a life that’s meaningful to you.
Take the Get Financially Fit Quiz Now >>
Ready for more hands-on support in redefining success? Consider booking a 90-minute Financial Fit Booster session or a series of four Financial Strategy Sessions to create your personalised roadmap to success on your terms.
What does success mean to you? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below!